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the power of the beast compels you
Mar. 18th, 2009 09:34 ami feel terribly compelled to write down the terrible things my mind thinks.
i am baffled and creeped out by the popularity of adam lambert: he often makes faces like he's taking a shit while he's singing. this is really distracting. last night i imagined him singing "burning ring of fire" about his hemorrhoids. he is so ridiculously broadway-musical that i am literally too embarrassed for him to watch the whole time he's on screen. i am not afraid of good camp, but he is a species of bad camp that is not just plain bad, it hurts my feelings, as kirk's mom likes to say about bad movies. i can already see the shots they will pick to use in his Proactiv commercial in a year or two. i will be really mad if he fucks up allison's chances, because she is genuine whereas he is some kind of terminator-style entertainbot sent from a disgusting california fametron future. he is like the main character from twilight, if twilight were a made for tv movie that aired on the CW and was filmed in burbank and pissed off all the fans of the book. i have never seen a single iota of sincerity in his singing, he's like those vampire rock stars from that one anne rice novel. he just turns on his face and out comes fakeness. ughghghg.
however, randy travis is a gentlemen and i enjoyed watching him alternately patronize and secretly laugh at the contestants last night. kirk told me stories about what his roadie crews are like (devoted) and he reminds me of kirk's dad, just a genuine person. he's so much nicer looking now that he's aged, even if he still looks weird.
my predictions: it will be allison versus adam in the final deathmatch, with that giraud piano dude as a third contender if he keeps making smart choices. lil is overrated. blind guy is still not that great, just a pity vote. he and dead-wife danny gokey will set up a travelling preacher-singer combo together. alexis doesn't care anymore, or was a little drunk last night, either way her arrangement of jolene sucked. anoop was cute, so was guitar guy whose name i never recall, they will both stay for a while longer.
sarver will go home tonight. or megan joy, if there's any justice in the world, which there isn't.
i am baffled and creeped out by the popularity of adam lambert: he often makes faces like he's taking a shit while he's singing. this is really distracting. last night i imagined him singing "burning ring of fire" about his hemorrhoids. he is so ridiculously broadway-musical that i am literally too embarrassed for him to watch the whole time he's on screen. i am not afraid of good camp, but he is a species of bad camp that is not just plain bad, it hurts my feelings, as kirk's mom likes to say about bad movies. i can already see the shots they will pick to use in his Proactiv commercial in a year or two. i will be really mad if he fucks up allison's chances, because she is genuine whereas he is some kind of terminator-style entertainbot sent from a disgusting california fametron future. he is like the main character from twilight, if twilight were a made for tv movie that aired on the CW and was filmed in burbank and pissed off all the fans of the book. i have never seen a single iota of sincerity in his singing, he's like those vampire rock stars from that one anne rice novel. he just turns on his face and out comes fakeness. ughghghg.
however, randy travis is a gentlemen and i enjoyed watching him alternately patronize and secretly laugh at the contestants last night. kirk told me stories about what his roadie crews are like (devoted) and he reminds me of kirk's dad, just a genuine person. he's so much nicer looking now that he's aged, even if he still looks weird.
my predictions: it will be allison versus adam in the final deathmatch, with that giraud piano dude as a third contender if he keeps making smart choices. lil is overrated. blind guy is still not that great, just a pity vote. he and dead-wife danny gokey will set up a travelling preacher-singer combo together. alexis doesn't care anymore, or was a little drunk last night, either way her arrangement of jolene sucked. anoop was cute, so was guitar guy whose name i never recall, they will both stay for a while longer.
sarver will go home tonight. or megan joy, if there's any justice in the world, which there isn't.
